people are strange, when you're a stranger...

Strange things that happened to me today:

* I got a massage today and it was of the full-body sort. The massage therapist took a good long time with all body parts except they only worked on my LegOfShortness for about 30 seconds, and only while it was draped with fabric (unlike all other body parts). This is not the first time this has happened to me when receiving bodywork, but this is my second massage with this therapist, and this was not even close to how it went last time. I, of course, in true AmpuTeeHee style, left the therapist's office with a wave of low self-esteem, rather than a happy glow. I want a refund.

* The Mrs half of Mr&MrsNextDoorNeighbor knocked on my door for the second time in 3 years (the first time was a couple of months ago; was close to 11pm and she was in her pajamas dragging my dog by the collar, while he dragged his feet with that Mwahaha-I-TOLD-You-I-Am-Houdini look on his mug). Today MrsNeighbor knocked and kindly offered me tomatoes from her garden and then immediately blurted out that MrNeighbor had left her and served divorce papers last week, ON her birthday. Then she started crying. All of this happened before I could even open my mouth to say thanks for the tomatoes or invite her in. She didn't accept my invitation to come in and sit because, "Oh, that would be too awkward. I barely know you."

* One of the ladies from the Senior Center knitting group (which I thought was a group, but it turns out it is not a group, it is a class, and guess what---apparently I am the teacher), called to tell me that she wont be able to make it this Thursday....but I could I teach her how to bind-off. Now? Over the phone? This, by the way, comes on the heels of a call from another one of the ladies calling me after 9pm at night asking me how to perform an SSK (for those who don't knit, that's a left-leaning decrease, and telling you that probably doesn't mean anything to you either now, does it). Yes, it was I that gave out my phone number a couple of weeks ago when I was asked for it. Shut up. The ladies asked me if they could have it so they could let me know if they weren't coming, which I told them the didn't really need to do, because I was going to be there one way or the other. But look where that got me. Teaching knitting by cell phone. (For the record, in both cases it was KnittingHelp.com to the rescue, and if I was actually getting PAID to teach this knitting class I'd send the KnittingHelp lady the proceeds).

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In other news, I had my first on person guitar lesson at the music shop today. It went pretty well because I'd already started futzing around on the internet ane had been learning some things.

Right after I got the guitar home, I downloaded a couple of free things onto the iPad. One is an app that shows how to play all the chords (like where to put your fingers, and you can also tap the screen and hear what the chord sounds like so you can make sure you got it right). The other app I downloaded was a few little beginning guitar lessons with streaming video. I liked them so much that I decided to pay for a couple of their more extensive download-able courses (which exactly what they want you to do, I do get that---but damn, they're actually really good lessons and not that much dough). Now every day I have a little guitar lesson with Ravi or Rich. I am having a blast.

The first day I got the guitar I also found (yay internet!) a sheet with the lyrics of one of my favorite Cat Steven's songs. Above the words are notations as to what chords to play. I went and taught myself G, D, E-minor, C, and A....and even though it's slow and clunky, I can actually play a whole song now!

Although my mom said I sounded like Bob Dylan, and she did not at all mean it as a compliment (actually, she was laughing at me, and going, "Like a rooooolin stoooooooon...."

I think she was referring to my singing and not my strumming, but thanks mom. Now I have another complex to work my way through. Don't worry, it's not as big as the complexes you gave me during my teen years.

Hahahahahaha.

(You guys. She read the blog. I am ribbing her. I'll catch crap for this tomorrow.)