Thursday, March 02, 2006

3rd grade science and math

Science
It was storming last night. The sounds of high winds had me up at 5am, and MyFK climbed into my bed around 6am because he couldn’t sleep either.
(man, how I’d wanted to doze until 7!)

“Mom…will you scratch my back?”
“Only for a minute. I’m reallllly tired and I’m trying to fall back asleep. Mommies need sleep, too ya’ know…”
“Nooooo. Mommies don’t need sleep.
(*pause*)
I learned that on Nova.”

(???)

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Math
Q. A teacher invites 3 parents to chaperone on a field trip with his 3rd grade class. How many adults will be in attendance?
1+3 = 4

Q. The class has 20 students, how many children is each adult responsible for?
20 divide by 4 = 5


Q. Three 3rd grade classes are going on the trip, each class having 20 students, 1 teacher and 3 chaperones.
How many students will be going, in total?
3 x 20= 60
Teachers?
3x1 = 3
Chaperones?
3 x 3 = 9

Q. If during snack time, all three teachers walk away, and 8 of the 9 parent chaperones are busy picking their noses, or staring off into space, or chatting with other parents while the kids are arguing over gummy snacks and all the wrappers are blowing all over the picnic area and the kids are pushing each other into a mud puddle.....(*ahem*, sorry, I digress)... WHAT is the ratio of children to adults that are paying attention?

60 to 1
(in case you couldn't tell, it is this AmputT that is the only 1 paying attention…and it made for a very long and hectic fieldtrip on a 6-acre working farm)

There is one last math problem I was not able to compute (I think it's algebra with a bit of physics maybe?):

Q. If there are 60 children on a bus, and all are screaming as loud as they possibly can, what is the decibel level inside the bus if all the windows are closed?

Anybody know? Just Curious.

1 comments:

Anonymous said...

The answer to your decibel question is relatively straightforward:

Assuming the Riemann Hypothesis to be true, we can then apply a Fourier Transform to the general Penrose equation for 60 children on a closed-window bus. Ignoring friction, and choosing units where the "screeching coefficient" is equal to unity (or ~ 1.2 for inner-city youth) we can then map the even & odd-order harmonics in terms of increasing child-annoyance.

In the classical limit, our result predicts a decibel level within 5% of "I'm going to strangle that kid and smack his parents upside their collective head".

Recent results in Quantum Field Tripping hint at the exciting possibility of a superposition-of-states whereby the loudest youth can become indistinguishable from his or her parent at sufficient blood pressure levels.

QED